"Hey Fatty! You can't do that, hahaha"
And a word that I genuinely hate. One which I think no one deserves to be called, no matter the reason.
I got caught in quite a deep, heart felt conversation this week. It is not often I am told a story that really gets to me. One that reminds me why every day I work like a slave.
This particular story was one which really did remind me why.
“Hey Gilly, how is my son doing?”
“Ahhh? I believe he is doing well. I mean I have not taken the teens class for a while now, but the Trainers have not mentioned anything, and of what I see he is progressing well and always seems to post some pretty good scores up on the board. Should I be concerned?”
“No. I was just curious, I know he sometimes feels like he is struggling, and I know he often would rather stay home than come to CrossFit. I know that at school his fellow students call him ‘Fatty’ and he often struggles to stay motivated…
Hey do you know what though, you know what is really cool. Earlier this week he proved them all wrong. They had a gym class, which I understand must have been a skills class. The Teacher asked the group to do either a Handstand or a Handstand push up I’m cannot be sure. However, my boy was the only one to put his hand up, and upside down he went. To the shock of the entire class he did what the teacher, who I imagine had assumed no one could do, a Handstand pushup. That day he came home stoked. He was absolutely wrapped, he had something over them. Not something negative, but something he had worked hard for and could do which no one else could”.
“Wow! That’s the kind of story which is why I genuinely want to help people. To help people achieve things that not only they, but others don’t think they can do. To help them succeed at life. To make the uncomfortable, comfortable.”
I know my approach to help people can be harsh, and direct. And often I say things people do not want to hear, or to know. But the reality is, sometimes it takes exactly that to change your life for the better.
I will always remember being bullied in school myself. The feeling of failure. Knowing that every day without doubt one of those boys would say something that would hurt me.
I eventually found myself in the principal’s office and, I am truly thankful for what he said…
“I am not going to do anything about those boys. I am not going to help you. Instead, you are going to help yourself. You are going to man up and take it on as a challenge. One day, you will look back at your years at school thankful for the experience. One day those boys will look to you as their boss, as their successor and they will ask you for help. It will be up to you then, to be the better person and to help them.”
Four and a half years later, as a second Lieutenant at 2 Wksp Coy, a junior soldier came to me to ask for help. A solider who 4 and a half years earlier had bullied me at school.
Yes Ironic, but proof that whether what my principal at the time had said was merely to get me out of his office or not, that it is up to you to put yourself in the right environment, on the right path, with the right support to achieve what you are truly capable of.
I hope one day that the boy in our teens class can do the same. Can one day help those boys who bully him. To endure the feeling of success that comes with it.
For now, I am stoked he has had the small, but massive achievement which has shown him a speck of light at the end of the tunnel. Enough light that will drive him to succeed not out of fear, but because he wants to.
Because he is capable of whatever he really wants